The Sleeping Critic

I'm introducing a new feature here at Steve's blog called "The Sleeping Critic." No, I won't be talking about mattresses or pillows. In this series, I will be reviewing films that caused me to fall asleep. To be clear, the fact that I fell asleep is no reflection on the quality of the movie, I can fall asleep pretty much anywhere. How can someone review a film that they slept through? Easy, I've been practicing this art for many years and have finally decided to put it to good use. The formula works something like this:

1. Find a nice comfy spot in a chair or on the couch
2. Watch the first ten to fifteen minutes of the film to get familiar with the key characters and the main plot points
3. A short nap
4. Wake up to catch a key piece of dialog
5. Repeat steps 3 and 4 until I wake up during the ending credits
6. Get a 30 second synopsis from Sue
7. If Sue has fallen asleep, read the synopsis on the front of the NetFlix envelope
8. Reach an informed opinion regarding the film

I've watched countless movies using exactly this same formula and not once has it failed me. Remember, knowledge is power, so use this formula wisely. Stay tuned for my first Sleeping Critic review of Capote coming soon.