It All Started with the Khakis

It happens so slowly you almost don't realize it. You start out in jeans and a T-shirt and then one day you look down and your wearing dress pants, a button down shirt, and slip on dress shoes. Slip-on dress shoes!  Oh sure, the they make it easier to get through airport security. I mean, who wants to unlace and re-lace their Doc Marten's while hordes of impatient briefcase toting automatons get all huffy behind you. Looking back, it all started with those damn khakis. I should have torn those things to shred the first time I laid eyes on them. The perfect compromise between slacks and casual pants is what the marketing would have you believe. I'll tell you what they really are: a gateway pant! It'll start with khakis but that just leads to fancier and fancier pants as you struggle to get your fix. Soon the image you had of yourself as an adult (remember that one from college?) has been replaced by a khaki wearing business person! That cool, hip adult you'd always assumed you would turn into? Gone. "But honey, those pants look really nice on you." It's a trick, don't fall for it. Your spouse is part of the conspiracy. I'm going back to jeans. Time to stick it to the man. Oh, and don't even get me started on the scourge that is the polo shirt.